Mourning ((RP for number_eight))

[arrow_of_apollo]

Four months ago (Gods, he thought, has it only been four months?), when Lee had moved into this cabin aboard Colonial One, he had looked at the small space and decided that while it wasn't the familiar locker he'd shared onboard the Galactica with Dee, it was a hell of a lot roomier than a even an officer's rack, so things couldn't be that bad. And although he had come to feel comfortable with the space, it had never become a home. It felt even less like one now.

Lee felt a hot, wet tear roll down his face and he wiped at it angrily. He couldn't count the number he'd shed in the last twelve hours, every one of them searing, every one of them painful. Part of him wondered if he was mourning more than just a person, he was mourning everything she had meant to him-- more importantly, the things she had given him.

Even when they weren't together, even when Lee knew she was furious with him, Dee had always been a kind of beacon of hope. Not just for him, but for everyone aboard the battlestar, his father especially. Her faith in Admiral Adama had been unwavering, and her belief that Lee was a good man meant for great things just as firm. She had believed when they had not.

And now she was dead, because she had lost that faith, and had those beliefs shattered. The wasted, blasted Earth had broken all of them, but Anastasia Dualla had had the furthest to fall.

Lee reached again for the bottle of ambrosia-- a gift from Colonel Tigh, of all people, who had handed it over without comment-- just as a knock sounded on the hatch of his quarters. He was confused for a moment until he remembered that someone from Galactica would be arriving with Dee's personal effects. Still gripping the half-empty bottle, knowing he would need its help, Lee rose and opened the hatch.

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[arrow-of-apollo.livejournal.com]

The pain burst across Lee's vision, like he'd managed to just dodge an explosion in his Viper. It stopped him, even from continuing to thrust into Sharon, he was so shocked. Of course, he'd asked her to hurt him, and it was just right that she'd take the same route he had. As Lee blinked and his brain settled back into place, he looked back at Sharon again. His sight was clear and sharp in a way it hadn't been since they'd found Earth. Something about the hurt and sharing it, giving it back and forth to someone who needed it, too... was helping.

Lee didn't understand how or why, only that if he could keep feeling this way, then he could just simply keep on going.

He started to move his hips again, ready to drive into Sharon's heat, but was stopped when she went vise-tight on him again. Sharon screamed his name, and as she came, the shuddering pressure pushed Lee over the edge. Her name escaped his chest in a roar as Lee pushed hard one last time, thrusting even deeper into her sex before exploding, too. His body wrenched and jerked as his climax hit with painful force.

Still shaking, Lee's arms gave out and he fell onto Sharon.

[number-eight.livejournal.com]

Her arms wrapped around his back and stroked the skin there softly in contrast to how they'd just frakked. Sharon wasn't sure what else she could do or say right now, though.

"I..."

She ended up pressing a kiss against his cheek as she held his body to hers, like it was the only real thing left in the whole galaxy somehow.

"I'll stay here with you if you want me to," she decided finally, biting her lip after she'd said it because she wasn't sure what Lee wanted anymore.

[arrow-of-apollo.livejournal.com]

Panting, Lee stared back at her. It was, perhaps, the worst and most insane idea ever offered. There was no reason for Sharon Agathon to spend more time with the Caprican delegate to the Quorum than necessary, no matter the fact that she'd been one of his pilots in his former career. They hadn't even been friends, so far as anyone knew.

But the feel of her with him... Lee couldn't make himself let go. He could feel the drifting sadness starting to pull at him, and he needed something to hold. Someone to hold.

"Yeah," he whispered. "Yeah, please." He'd deal with the consquences later.

They settled in, awkward and unsure, but never releasing one another.